Monday, November 28, 2011

Let's Talk Turkey

I thought long and hard about posting about how grateful I am for everything in my life...then I decided that would be predictable and boring and that it would be much more fun to keep it real. Maybe a little too real.

Despite our best efforts, our Thanksgiving dinner was slightly botched.  We had all agreed that we would try to simplify things this year and go out to supper dinner.  We made reservations for noon and got all gussied up.  My dad even put on his fancy jeans.  Unfortunately, when we got to the restaurant, we discovered that someone had mistakenly given our table away.  Our rowdy group of 15 was now going to be seated at three different tables, which would not only prevent us from having any meaningful conversations but would also keep us from being our obnoxious selves -- boo.

Then I remembered a friend of mine likes to take pictures of her family eating at every major life event. Because we didn't have a lot going on with our group, I decided to give it a whirl. I started with my mom, who was totally lame. Rather than looking awkward or unflattering, she looked like some sort of Cool Whip model:

So I moved on to the boys...they did not disappoint.  The fact that several of them didn't actually know I was taking their picture is irrelevant.  They were all clearly enjoying some dried out turkey and one of them was even eating his muffin wrapper.  Toddlers rock.

By then I was feeling a little guilty. Here we were, gathered at this special time, trying to enjoy each other's company, and all I want to do was capture people at their worst. So I redeemed myself. I got a few cute pictures of my aunt and uncle, as well as a sweet photo of my cousin and her fiance. Unfortunately, their newborn was asleep and I had recently suffered from a case of the black lung, so there was no baby fix for me. Also boo.

I was, however, able to snap a few pics of the big kids, especially my niece, who is actually asking for her two front teeth this year (don't judge me, I love that song). 

In the true holiday spirit, I thought I should at least try to get a shot of my brother smiling.  Joke's on me, apparently he just looks like that.

Happy Belated Turkey Day -- I hope you got your eat on...cuz you know we did! 

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Minding Our Manners

David and I don't really fight.  Don't get me wrong, we can bicker like nobody's business, but we're not the couple you're going to see on the news for distubring the peace.  I've never locked him out of the house and he's never threatened to have me committed.  It's a beautiful, harmonious relationship...either that, or he just lets me win because arguing with me is exhausting and he would rather spend his time eating a sandwich.

Regardless, we got into a bit of a tiff on Saturday morning as we were headed out to run errands.  This was complicated by the fact that our daughter is like a real person now.  She regularly takes sides in our discussions and is quick to tell either of us if we're being rude or need to apologize.  I would be okay with her participation, except she usually sides with David - not cool.

While we were arguing in the car on Saturday, I realized that Morgan was hanging on our every word.  Her eyes were wide open and she kept looking back and forth between us like she was watching some sort of bizarre ping pong game.  David and I needed to shut it down.  However, I was not AT ALL going to take responsibility for him being crabby with me (Remember what I said about sandwiches?  Without them, he's like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde). David, on the other hand, was just as committed to being right.  But we're good parents, and we need to set a good example.  Hence, the following:

Me: I'm sorry we fought in the car. (Notice I am not admitting fault)

David:  Yeah, I'm sorry, too.  And I'm sorry you were such a jerk. (Notice David has now apologized for me being mean to him)

Me:  And I'm sorry you were hungry and cranky and took it out on me. (Notice I am on to him and am not about to concede)

David: Yeah, I am hungry. (Notice me still winning...every time.)

Poor guy doesn't stand a chance.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Pancake Pride

As are most toddlers, Morgan is OBSESSED with her name.  She points out letters wherever we go and assumes that any word that starts with an "M" is going to end in "organ" -- Not surprisingly, she's usually wrong.  As a special treat last Sunday, David decided to rock her little world.  Not only was she getting pancakes, but the whole plate was going to be dedicated to her.  

Her reaction did not disappoint.  She was shocked, she was awed, she was ecstatic.  In fact, Morgan was so pleased that it took her nearly 20 minutes just to decide which one to eat first.  When I tried to get in on the action, she was only willing to share with me after biting the leg off her "R" -- as a result, her name briefly resembled the word "Mupgan"  (or yeah, she'd also taken a taste of her "O") --  Let's just hope she doesn't ask for the whole alphabet next week -- we haven't got that much time or batter. Plus, David needs to start making those pancakes in cursive...

Don't let that smile fool you.  Get too close to those pancakes and she WILL take off a finger.

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Stranger Danger

Morgan's daycare has recently been focused on personal safety, including everything from holding hands in the crosswalk to avoiding strangers.  Not surprisingly, these lessons have spilled over to our conversations at home. Over the past few weeks, Morgan has been insisting that I play "the stranger"  and she play "the little girl" (original casting, I know).  Despite my best efforts to sound like a creepy bad guy, Morgan had a little trouble remembering her lines...
The next round was a little better...right up until I offered her a ride in my car.  The look on her face tells me we have a long way to go in the stranger danger department. 

Monday, November 7, 2011

Monkey See, Monkey Do

We recently hosted our first "quasi" sleepover.   I say quasi because I finally dragged our daughter off to bed at about 10:00 but her little friends continued to party like rock stars until their parents came to get them a few hours later. David and I may or may not have nodded off in the interim.

Despite the late hour, I couldn't help but notice just how well these little monkeys were behaving.  And then a very familiar image suddenly popped into my head. I just couldn't stop myself.

They were just about the cutest little wise monkeys I'd ever seen. Of course, shortly after they took these pictures, I realized their precious behavior was just the calm before the storm.  I had no idea our light fixtures had weight limits.  Monkeys, indeed.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Feeling Itty Bitty

Morgan had a really big splinter tonight.  I'd show you, but she refused to hold out her hand long enough for me to get a picture.  It looked like it was getting infected, so I knew it had to come out.  After I begged, pleaded and even tried to distract her with 254 pieces of Halloween candy, she was still convinced my actual plan was to cut her arm off, not save her from gangreen.

So I told David to hold her in a big bear hug so I could quickly go after the splinter with my handy tweezers.  That was also a no-go; Morgan started wailing and thrashing like possessed fish out of water.  Once I finally got a look at her hand, the splinter was gone.  All of the violence must have shaken it loose.

Despite the fact that I never actually touched her hand, Morgan began sobbing.  Between the tears and snot, she managed to utter the following,  " Mommy, you have to be gentle with me!  I'm just a little girl!!!!"

Point taken.